Thursday, October 21, 2010

Ornament Parties with Tacky Themes...These Are A Few Of My Favorite Things!

At last blogging on this backlogged blog, I'd just returned from New Orleans. The Christmas season  was now in full swing and the rest of December was spent doing the usual December things, decorating trees, baking legions of cookies, and attending various pageants, parades, and parties.

One of my favorite parties is Jenny's Annual Ornament Exchange. Basically, a group of us girls that have been friends for many years get together and have a good time eating, playing dirty Santa, and going to the local tree farm. However, a couple of years ago, I suggested that we kick it up a notch by adding a theme to our standard get together.

Bringing sexy back.
Christmas Sweaters! Now, these aren't your mother's Christmas sweaters...well, actually, they might have been...maybe even Grandma's. But really, that's the whole point. Sure, everyone's doing the whole "ugly sweater" party theme nowadays, but that's because it's fun, if not completely retarded. 

"Oh my gosh, I'm baking!"
We each bring some kind of baked good or savory snack. Jenny usually makes the pigs in a blanket and I am under strict orders to bring sugar cookies. By the end of the food, as we're all slipping into diabetic comas, we move on to the ornament exchange.

"IT'S ALL I WANTED!"
We can be pretty ruthless in getting the ornament we want. I brought this little gem back from New Orleans and Jen was pretty stoked to get it...until I stole it back. Yeah, my own ornament. I'm that person. 

 Jerkface.
Still, it's no big deal because everyone brings great ornaments so it's not like you're going to get stuck with a macaroni string covered in glitter and finger paint. (Awesome if you're 7...not so much when you're 27...or up...)

 That's right.

 Trees!
After the food fest and the ornament exchange we head out to Pine Hill Tree Farm to goof around for a bit. They have live reindeer, wagon rides, a Christmas store, and awesome cider.

 Future Macy's product.
Here I am at Pine Hill, in the store. It's wonderfully decorated...much like myself. Speaking of that, I actually made this sweater. It used to live a lonely and boring life at the thrift store, but I rescued it from its sad mediocrity...and let me tell you, ladies of a certain age LOVE. IT.  

Legitimately.

I was asked several times if I purchased it at Macy's. Macy's! Holding back my laughter, which took, trust me, a Herculean effort, I explained that I actually made it myself. After much 'ooing' and 'ahhing,' I was told I should go sell them at, again, Macy's. Last time I checked, Macy's didn't buy its stock from some chick with a box of sweaters in the back of her Hyundai, but hey, if I want to sell them 'at' Macy's, that parking lot is fair game baby.

 Upchuck and Klutzo...rejected by Santa.
The tree farm has two reindeer. If you're there at the right time, you can feed them. You'd think they'd be jonesing for something like oats or grains, or some other kind of 'feed,' but no. These guys like overripe bananas. I guess they find them...say it with me...appealing. ha ha! ...apologizes.

Reindeer games.

Sleigh rides.
 We continued to play for a while and disturb the peace and tranquility of the other patrons with our gallivanting (I just used the word gallivanting.) and general ridiculousness. Of course, most likely to the chagrin of the employees, none of us bought a tree, but I like to think we spread a little joy.

I'm ready for my close up, Olan Mills!
Tacky sweaters, the 'look away,' and the 'arm shelf'...that's how you say Christmas.

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